In the span of one week, 3 people that I’ve known have gotten engaged. All 20-somethings, one of which was actually my favorite couple way back when in high school. I guess it’s that time of the year, where everyone who is already in love is making plans for the future. But what about the rest of us, you know, the single ones?
I’m still hopeful. Times may be tough, but there’s nothing wrong with setting the bar high for my future. This holiday season, nothing would make me happier than my very own Mr. Resume. He’s obviously the opposite of the Ill-Mannered Man. While no one is perfect, Mr. Resume is probably the closest thing you’ll get to that. He’s someone you can take home to mom. He’s a polite, well-spoken, a real white-collared working gentleman (he’s also probably white). He must also look good in a suit. This is a no brainer. Acting the part is one thing, but looking it is probably much more important. You’re going to want to take and upload countless pictures of the two of you. It’s not real until you flaunt it online.
There’s a few simple ways to check out and see if your suitor is worthy, because who doesn’t Google everyone they meet? Doing proper stalking research is crucial these days.
It’s a 20 something commandment. If he doesn’t have an online resume, then he doesn’t deserve any of your time. No history of his prior accomplishments and internships? He must be hiding something or lazy. Mr. Resume is a go-getter. The government, fedcons, the hill, you get the picture. No one talks anymore, why ask him about where he got his masters or where he works, just find out that info for yourself! A LinkedIn is Mr. Resume’s E! True Hollywood story. You can find out all the highlights and information you need to know about him by checking it out.
A direct quote from a friend:” His profile picture is him holding an African child.”
If he’s in pictures with random girls partying it up on the weekend or anything else of the sorts, drop him quick. If he “likes” getting wasted or anything of the sorts, no. You want to be able to show his profile to mom. People clean up their profiles all the time for future employers, but it’s really more important to do it for your future spouse. Keep it clean.
As a twitter rule of thumb, if he has to tweet and delete, hes out. It should also be noted that he shouldn’t be following shady or questionable people.
Of course, there are other tools you can use to see if he stacks up to be Mr. Resume, if he works on the hill you can go to legistorm to find out his salary. Even better, just check where he lives, his car, his friends, etc. Either way, you’ll still have to get #careyFIT, to nab him. Don’t expect to just sit on the couch and eat tubs of ice cream wallowing in the fact that you’re single (only acceptable after the initial break up babes), you’ve got to werq it to be his stay at home Mrs.